Its been 3 years since I did any blogging. I am sure no one reads them but I thought I'd start writing again. So much has happened in my life. Some of it has been really good but much of has been very tragic and I am trying to come to grips with all of it.
June 22, 2016 I lost my beloved husband Chuck. Its a long story that cannot be re-counted right now but lets just say his death was caused by careless hospital staff. He was young (in todays world) and we had so many plans. We were going on a cruise to the Panama canal and then to Europe. I still went on those trips and I knew he was with my the whole time. In August 2017 my dear brother Bobby died. He had a stroke the year before but was on his way to recovery. He was two days from coming home and he died of a pulmonary embolism. He was my best friend and I miss him like crazy. Top that all off with my mom, who is now 93 and lives with me, falling deeper into vascular dementia. I miss her too, which is even more tragic since she is with me everyday.
All of these events have left me with uncertainty about the future. Financially I struggle. Emotionally I am so challenged. I find myself in the dark, lonely place in my mind and often struggle to climb my way out. My family and friends have been an amazing support system. Amanda has been there for me and understands me. Leela and Megan have held my hand and allowed me to cry..lifted me up and joined me on my travels.
So many people are there for me and yet I feel very alone sometimes. Alanna the Beautiful is my saving grace. Her smile make life worth living.
In June I went to Italy for 17 fantastic days. What an amazing adventure...which I will blog about in the very near future..The sights, the food, the wine..the people..Wonderful.
So, here I am..opening my soul to anyone who reads this. Understand I am not seeking your sympathy. I just need to get it out there in hopes that I can understand myself better.
Keep checking..if anyone is out there..More to follow
June 22, 2016 I lost my beloved husband Chuck. Its a long story that cannot be re-counted right now but lets just say his death was caused by careless hospital staff. He was young (in todays world) and we had so many plans. We were going on a cruise to the Panama canal and then to Europe. I still went on those trips and I knew he was with my the whole time. In August 2017 my dear brother Bobby died. He had a stroke the year before but was on his way to recovery. He was two days from coming home and he died of a pulmonary embolism. He was my best friend and I miss him like crazy. Top that all off with my mom, who is now 93 and lives with me, falling deeper into vascular dementia. I miss her too, which is even more tragic since she is with me everyday.
All of these events have left me with uncertainty about the future. Financially I struggle. Emotionally I am so challenged. I find myself in the dark, lonely place in my mind and often struggle to climb my way out. My family and friends have been an amazing support system. Amanda has been there for me and understands me. Leela and Megan have held my hand and allowed me to cry..lifted me up and joined me on my travels.
So many people are there for me and yet I feel very alone sometimes. Alanna the Beautiful is my saving grace. Her smile make life worth living.
In June I went to Italy for 17 fantastic days. What an amazing adventure...which I will blog about in the very near future..The sights, the food, the wine..the people..Wonderful.
So, here I am..opening my soul to anyone who reads this. Understand I am not seeking your sympathy. I just need to get it out there in hopes that I can understand myself better.
Keep checking..if anyone is out there..More to follow
